69 year old pedophilic lawyer, Connor Sonson, aka Richard Handy, had just completed the eleventy thousand godzillianth hour of his community service, cleaning the toilets of an old folks' home, that he was sentenced to after being found guilty for watching child porn and underhand dealings.

"Finally I'm done with this bloody toilet job and can finally get back home to my beloved porn. I wonder why all those passer-bys are giving me that look... Do I smell that bad?" Handy thought to himself, and raised one arm and sniffed it. "I don't smell half bad, eh! Heh heh I must've gotten used to the smell of those goddamn toilets..."

"Hmm I wonder what time is it now?" Handy had spent such a long time cleaning toilets, he had lost track of time. His watch said 06:09 PM. "It's nearly dinner time.. Damn but I'm not really that hungry. I guess... I could catch up on the latest child porn when I get home." The pedophile thought to himself and boarded the train home. The ride home was rather long and he spent an hour and nine minutes sleeping.

"Cone Bond Station!" the speakers on the train announced, and jerked Richard Handy awake. "Conebone69? That's not me... not me... Really..." He mumbled, half-asleep and staggered off the train like a drunkard. "Watch it!" A young man shouted as Handy crashed into him. "But.. but.. I don't have a fetish for elderly women! Just... them bears..." Handy muttered as he crashed into a street lamp. Handy cursed at the streetlight and opened his eyes to get a better look at the dumbass who didn't see where he was going.

"What the.. it's just a streetlight..." He turned to see where he was, and realised he was on Edobear Lane, and he was just outside his apartment. Handy finally reached his front door and the first thing that greeted him was Ms. Girly Whirly, his beloved laptop. "Ms. Girly Whirly! I've missed you so much, along with the gloriously illicit child pornography you provide me with!" Handy cried and bowed before his goddess, before covering her in slobbery kisses.

Six hours and nine seconds later, Richard Handy got rather bored of watching his child pornography and decided to move onto his other pedophilic hobby... Chatting with young girls in chat rooms.

 

 

A few seconds later, CONEBONE69 signed into his Winx Club account...

 

CONEBONE69: Hey is this Katie?

PrincessKatie96: Yes, It's the Princess! Who is this peasant?

CONEBONE69: Oh I'm Prince Connor, nice to meet you. Haha how old are you?

PrincessKatie96: Umm Mommy and Daddy said I cannot tell strangers!

CONEBONE69: But I'm not a stranger, Princess Katie! I'm Prince Connor and I'm your age too! Do you have a webcam? Then we can talk to each other instead, Katie!

PrincessKatie96: Tell me how old you are first, Prince Connor!

CONEBONE69: I'm 9! What about you?

PrincessKatie96: Ohhh nine is my favourite number.

CONEBONE69: Katie are you in your undies now?

PrincessKatie96: Why do you want to know? You're so nosy! And it's PRINCESS to you. Peasant!

CONEBONE69: Aww I'm sorry princess... Let's play a game since I was so bad and forgot to call you Princess Katie!

PrincessKatie96: Sure, what game do you wanna play? Winx Water Sports or Winx Club Canoes? I love being in my pink bikini!!!11

CONEBONE69: Pink... bikini? Do you happen to be wearing one now and have a webcam Princess Katie? Then we can play that game...

PrincessKatie96: What game? Yes I'm in a pink bikini.. I don't think I have a webcam.. Should I go ask daddy?

CONEBONE69: Awwww that's too bad then! I was going to suggest this really fun game, where we see who can take off their clothes fastest.. But oh well! Hmm do you have many hobbies, Princess Katie??

PrincessKatie96: Yes. Why do you wanna know?

CONEBONE69: Do you happen to act in films? Where you're... nakey? I just watched about six hours worth of those movies! They're sooo fun.

PrincessKatie96: CONNOR SONSON AKA RICHARD HANDY YOU ARE UNDER ARREST. WE KNOW YOUR CURRENT LOCATION AND IF YOU DON’T WANT TO GO TO JAIL........

I love Rachel my one and only true love who wears black undies all the time. Nakey nakeyy! (:

(HAHA! Gotcha! By now you must be like, huhhhhhh?! No link! Now all of you aren’t gonna know the ending unless this becomes the most popular post in blogosphere history! So spread the word! VIRALLLLLLLLLL)




Written by: Rachel (mostly) and Thomson.

It's been quite some a times since I is having to blogs here. All the reason is because of the place where I go to study called school which makes me busy and have no times to blog here. I no likey. But then my girlfriend want me to tell you all about pussy magnet and tongue which is nice for her, and good for me. I knows! I is good!

I had the nicest sexy times with the girl I love many many, last last thursdays which is of the many days ago date of 30 oktobuh. Obviously that day when I go see her was after I have not seens her in a long time and so we boths have longing for each other and so when I turn on my pussy magnet she got funny feelings inside that make her turn on. Heh heh heh. I knows! I is good!

So I mets her a place the HMV store where I buy my favourite music like Miley Cyrus and Celine Dion and Aaron Carter. Then when inside I hugs her from behind when she looking at earphones and then she cannot concentrate because of my pussy magnet! I knows! I is good!

After that we went to meet the crazy hornse and the walrus and the hornse was hungry. To prevents her from eating my nice sexy hair we guide her to the US & A place to eat. Very niceeeeeee! She had the nachos with the chillis and the drink called the sex on the beach! Oooohhhh me likeyyyyyy..!! She look like she like sex on the beach very much, but not so much the nachos as she like very much killing them with the fork. I think this is the doing of the pussy magnet again! I knows! I is good!

And then when the hornse belly was filled we went to the cinema for the purpose of watching movie. The hornse was very happy and chooosed a bimbo movie with lots of female who look like they cannot think about anything for they are dumb, maybe except the sex. Me and my girlfriend sneaked to the back for corner seat to make sexy time and didn't watch many or much about the movie. I can tell that my girlfriend is liked my tongue very much when I kiss her because it gave her funny feelings and turned her on and she kept sucking on it which turn me on too. No romance explosion though. But still she is likes it so much she gave my tongue a name. My tongue is now called Slytherin. She liked it so much after that when I eating my lunch and sending her home she still wanted more! Tongue slut! But me likey it too! (: All this is thanks to my pussy magnet again, it give the power to turn on! I knows! I is good!

Awww it's been another quite long time since I see her and I is miss her very much. I love you and I miss you my princess! Slytherin and pussy magnet love you and miss you too! 

I knows! I is good!

Finallys! It is almost overs! My workings here at the boring work place called office where I come everyday to work is ending on the morrow! GREAT SUCCESS!

Today morning I almost had happy times in the subway train when it break down for a while. But it was only a while, so no fun. No late for work then and work was as usual the sames.

At lunch time my princess called me and it was happy times (: So nice to hear her beautiful voice again which she thinks is not nice I dunno why. But her voice is sound like angel is singings to me X)

After that when after I eated my lunch, I come back to office to try works, but find it very not easy to concentrate on the works, because all I kept thinking about was my princess! I never able to get her off my mind, cuz she has my bwains! She is inside all the time, park her butt and sits down there, so she always on my mind. I miss her so muchhhhhh, more than when I misses my cows when they go for summer slaughter camp. I LOVE A YOU MOST PRINCESS!

Aiyayayaya. Now when I is want to blogs I gets busy and gots many many thingys to do again!

Update more later! Tata for nows, pussies!

The stupid woman sitting behinds me at my working place office where I go to work, I say to you FUCK A YOU! You are fucking nosiy! Always complaining about this or that.  YOU are the blooooody annoying woman person! Also always coughing out loud, spreading your germies too! You you YOU KISS MY ASS! And not just you is noisy, many the times you also always playing that horrible music! Worse still when you sing along! AHHHHHHHHH! You sing like DUCK! FUCK A YOU DUCK!

If I gets sick cuz of stupid woman at work place spreading the germies, I NOT COMING BACK TO WORK! FUCK A WORK!

I is hating the works at my working place. Cuz it is stupid, I do stupid things which are not very clever people can do also. But since they want to pay me to do stupid things, I do. But I not doing this forever, I is leaving this place where I working everyday, very the soon! HAH HAH! FUCK A YOU! GOOD RADIANCE!

I is also slacking now, not doing my work, because work is stupid. So I blog. I getting paid to blog! GREAT SUCCESS!

I is missing my princess ): I love youuuuu, so muchhhhhhhh.

Almost one month since my last postings on here and so now I shall do another one while I is working at work. Work is boring, but me do it. I don't know why. I shall as now describes my workings to you. Every morning I get up at morning, and get ready for going to works. I take the subway train to work every morning and squeeze with people like sardines. Today morning, train broke down for about 5 minutes so it was quite fun times. A bit late for work in the end but it was not just me as train beak down for many many peoples.

Now I is sitting at my desk and the other person sit at desk behind me playing shit music all the long day! Where is the good music like AMR, Teletubbies, Barney and Hi 5? I fucking hate chinese shit music, R and B and all that pop shit. Fuck a you!

Actually there is nothings to talk about work. You don't want to know my work, it boring. Oh well I shall continues to blog and waste working times. Tee hee.

I shall now blogs about my girlfriend. Everyone know I like sex. Of course! Who doesn't? It's nice! But one thing I like more than sex, is my girlfriend! I more than likes her, I LOVE HER! She love me too. We love each other very much. I love you, you love me, just like BARNEY my favourite show!

Sometimes, like yesterday night, my girlfriend make me feel a tiny feeling frustrated and a bit angry because I see her mood suddenly change and I can't seems to do anythings about it and that affects my moods too. She can feel it too and she will apologize to me. But I know, it is difficult for her, I understands. She has always been there for me when sad times and good times. So I will also the same be there for her for sad times and good times. I am the hoping that the days ahead are going to be not so difficult for her. Stay strong, my love. I will always be the here, and be over there also for you! Wherever you are! (: I LOVE YOU PRINCESS!  X)

We is in loving with each other so much we are willing to wait much years to be with each other because we can see each other very little. And it is very difficult for us and we have been through many many heart pain. But we both know it will be worth it! No one really understands what two of us peoples so deeply in love, deep like the big big swimming pool called Indian Ocean, is going throughs. There is so many things that are bads for us and make things difficult. It is so difficult that I bet my donkey not many of yous can stand this test of love! So anyone who doubts our love, I say FUCK A YOU! We will proves you wrong and we will make it!

 Hi. I is pussymagnet. I LIKE YOU! I LIKE SEX! IT'S NICE! I is the pussymagnet and just like I very much like to look at women make toilet, I also very much like to using this livejournal account to see the other livejournal accounts for good time, like http://camerageek2912.livejournal.com

That lj account is the belong to that awesome keyboardist from the really awesome goodest bestest band, AMR. Yeap, that issa him, ZacBlack. HI ZACBLACK! I is finally create a lj account! Now I can read your posts! GREAT SUCCESS!!

But then also I will be using this account to update sometimes on the naughty naughty going in my life. Yeah heh heh, it's nice! Verryyyyyyyy nice!